In the Swing

A few months ago I wrote about going through premature menopause and I realize that this is a very personal topic to discuss. I can only hope that someday a survivor will stumble across these entries and find a connection and someone who can relate. I also think it is much easier to write this all out here with no one around and no real fear of rejection, questions, or pity stares then to sit down and share. It just seems kind of vain or depressing if I were to bring this up in friendly conversation. So sharing is a two-fold purpose.... I hope this helps others and it is therapeutic to me. Over the summer it became clear that I was nearing the end of my cycles due to high levels of radiation of a child. It makes me realize all the more how miraculous it is that my children are here. They shouldn't be and it is a huge testament to how big my God is. Over the summer I literally was having a cycle every 8-12 days which made me a crazy hormonal mess... Especially because I knew what it meant. Then in August I slowed down and felt more pregnant then I have ever felt before. Matt and I were secretly rejoicing... Had we once again defied modern medicine? I was late and we got even more excited. Almost a week went by and then I began cramping and after my third babies labor, it felt like that... Like my body was pushing on its own and we miscarried. It was a weird feeling. I was sad, but also slightly hopedul that we could maybe have a chance of having another baby. And then this month came around I began to think what if I keep getting pregnant and miscarrying... Is that even possible? Is that the equivalent to the worse hormonal months ever!? It's just so many unknowns that make for a very unsure walk of faith. But God knows and we are trusting Him. If its a no, it's a no.... But we won't stop praying or trying until we know for certain no matter how much heartache we go through on the way, because following him is worth it. The other night I was in some pain and emotionally drained and I looked at my husband and said, "I am so thankful we married when we did. I am so thankful we never said our apartment is to small to have a baby. I am so thankful we never worried about money. Because if we had, we wouldn't have any of our three babies." I know we wouldn't. If we had decided God couldnt handle it for us, if we had let all the negatives and worldly things stop us, we really and truly would have missed out on some of e greatest gifts God has ever given us. I am so, so glad we trusted the Lord even though it was so hard. When we got pregnant when our first born was 9 months old, I remember thinking what will people think? You know what I think? How could we have thought for a second God didn't have another precious gift he was so excited to give us. And we had our only girl and she lights up our lives. And then our third... We live in a small three bedroom home and had one of each, so shouldnt that be enough? I'm so glad we didn't stop there and got a wonderful surprise third baby. He's crazy, but rounds us out so nicely. His older brother and him are two peas in a pod. So now I am going to go to the heart of the matter.... It kills me... Literally breaks my heart and keeps me in tears when I hear people say they planned it out, they can't afford more, or are on the pill. I know I can't judge, but I can hopefully shed some light on the truth. It's wrong. God is the author of life and oh, how he loves us. He knows what is best and he has plans for these little ones. When I think of the what ifs I get chills. What if we had waited... What if we had waited? I'd never have children most likely. And to hear of people who can and don't.... I honestly don't understand. I ache for more, to receive Gods blessings, and see so many others carefully planning it out, but missing Gods plan. You are missing Gods plan when you wait when you are married. You are disobeying his command to be fruitful and multiply.... It is a direct command he gave us and one of the first actually... It's not an option. It's not a when we're ready. When we have more money. When we have a bigger house. When we are ready, we'll let you know God. I can't imagine asking Him to work on my timeframe. The God who for,Ed the stars, shaped the mountains, gave food exploding flavor, fields vibrant color pallets.... Please wait, I'm not ready. Would you turn away any of his others blessings? If he said he was giving you. Million dollars, would you say, well... I'm not really ready for that type of blessing? Children are priceless... Much more precious then anything on this earth. Precious are they in His sight and I imagine the current thought trend breaks His heart. Okay, I know that was personal, but I needed to get that out. It's been swimming around my heart all week and then some. Now I am off to check on my three sleeping babies and rejoice that they are here :)

Does Disney Still= the Most Magical Place on Earth for Families?

Okay, let me begin by saying how much of a Magical place Disney is-- it really is! The cast members are all super sweet and very helpful and your family will have memories for a life time! I am hoping to do a post on how to make it easier and much more relaxing for all involved, so stay tuned!

But, is Disney still the best place for families with values and standards? We went to one of their waterparks for the first time this year (Blizzard beach) and there were so many Europeans and Brazilians wearing very revealing bathing suits. Very, very revealing bathing suits. It was embarrassing when our kids asked why some ladies bottoms didnt fit in their bathing suits and the men with their teeny tiny speedos-- oh my! Supposedly, if you complain to a cast member, they will ask the other guest to change-- but why should we even be put in the position to complain or draw it to their attention, because, honestly, you can miss it!? Its a family waterpark and it will make the bikinis that you see at other waterparks look almost modest!

Another incident that happened wasn't directly related to disney, but just wait... My husband got very sick one day at Epcot and as he was in the bathroom for all the world to hear getting sick (literally-- the whole world since we were in Epcot)-- a lady walked by and said right to my kids, "Oh my wife is really sick from food poisioning-- hope he doesn't have it too!. My oldest son waited till she walked away and then said, "Mom, why did that lady say she had a wife?" We talked about this life choice and the sinful life style this person was chosing to live in, but really-- not where or when I wanted to have that conversation. I couldnt believe that lady said that right to my kids. We know a few gay people and they are very sensitive and considerate and don't flaunt it in front of the kids. Disney is known for being extremely friendly to homosexuals and here is an article that goes into more detail-- http://www.cuttingedge.org/news/n1181.cfm. Do be aware that this is something you will encounter whether its two mommies in line or a couple holding hands, or a male dressed as a female (yes we saw that too). Be prepared to know how to handle it and that it could very well be encountered on your trip. Another thing we were also surprised at was Epcot's night time light show. We had been told this was the firework show to see so I was pretty excited. We got seats early and all of the sudden, a boat catches on fire! I really thought it was a real fire and thought someone might be on fire, but my husband who had read the information said it was a re-telling of how the world began as the Globe all lit up comes out next. I really am glad my kids had no clue as we don't see evolution as having an ounce of truth. So, again, just something to be ready for. There was an Ellen show with Bill Nye that we walked out of as well-- mainly because so many people came into the theater as it was running talking really loud and my husband was pretty sick-- but Bill Nye openly supports evoulition and Ellen is an open homosexual. Epcot can be a great learning environment, but there are a lot or re-teachable moments that will happen there more then anywhere else. Did we love Disney-- yes! Will we go back, we'll see-- as our kids get older, these things will be even more noticable to them and if Disney embraces the world and it's lust for sin more and more, then maybe not. We shall see.....

Eating Healthy Menu Planning Ideas on a Budget

When we say that we are eating or trying to eat better people say that must cost so much more money or they're not sure where to start or it doesn't matter- food is food.

Well, we believe all food was designed by the creator to be the same, man just got in the way and didn't make things much better. Where to start-- again, begin making small changes-- a few things here and there. Go from vegetable oil to coconut oil, white flour to whole wheat flor, and store bought to homemade.

Saving money-- okay-- I am going to tell you how and why this can be so easy and affordable. Our recent trip was some of our healthiest choices to date, I shopped for two weeks, and all for 170.74. AND thats for a family of five. Which, for each week, thats 85 dollars and 37 ish cents (its late-- forgive my math right now). Pretty dang good. I will probably go out for more fruit-- so lets say five more bucks a week and 90 dollars a week for five people-- still awesome! And I did this at Giant-- so very doable!

Here are what some of our meals look like--




Breakfast-- homemade wheat and berry muffins (http://www.100daysofrealfood.com/2010/05/12/recipe-fruit-nut-or-berry-or-whatever-you-want-them-to-be-whole-wheat-muffins/), half a hard boiled egg, and some blackberries on the side. The kids also had some choc. almond milk too.

Lunch-- we either have some sort of sandwhich on homemade bread (I bought two bags of really good whole wheat flour and so far onebag has yielded 4 huge loaves of bread, 12 muffins, and some other small things-- a very well spent 4 dollars)-- the kids like PB&J-- we have found some really good no sugar added brands.




I like hummus, some tomato, spinach leaves, and some fresh mozzerella on mine. We also will probably have some egg salad as the bread goes a little stale next week :) Leftovers are also a lunch choice as are WW crackers and PB&J. On the side of our sandwhich we have some strawberry and kiwi fruit salad and some all natural chips (I told you-- these are my weakness!). Everything is portioned out and we have such a colorful display and it is very fulfilling.




For dinner-- here is what we had tonight. http://life-as-a-lofthouse.blogspot.com/2010/09/baked-sweet-and-sour-chicken-with-fried.html. I am not going to lie-- I love fried rice and if we had gone to wegmans where I happen to find theirs to have too many onions, it would have cost us around 40 dollars for the whole family-- this was 8 dollars for the whole kit and caboodle! score. I made the sweet and sour chicken too with two large chicken breasts and there were leftovers (read-- for lunch tomorrow). I also used a much healthier rice grain, honey instead of sugar for the sweet and sour and some other better choices then what you'd find out to eat.

Last night we had rice (hey-- rice is a great starch that can be done many ways and is healthy when you pick the right grain and a great way to strecth your budget), shrimp skewers (fresh shrimp that I had to peel) and some leftover tortillas from when we made them last week with cheese and spinach and cilantro.

So, if you want to save money and eat better here are some tips--

1. Make your own breads, tortillas, muffins, etc. The quality will be better and the quanity greater so you can stretch your dime and fill up on some yummier and healthier items. We are making homemade granola next week and for how much I paid for enough oats for many meals is less than what I'd pay for a puny bag in the health aisle.

2. When you get home from the store-- cut your fruit up, boil your eggs, make some muffins for the next day, etc.

3. Make a menu plan that fits your family and a budget and stick to it. Know what you are eating each meal.

4. use whats left in your pantry and freezer and incorporate these items into your meal plan if at all possible.

5. Make large batches when possible and freeze some extras. We defrosted some homemade naan bread for the day when I did grocery shopping and it was yummy and homemade and using what was already there.

6. Things like spinach are so healthy and can pop up all over in many meals.

7. Grow your own veggies and borrow from others. My parents had a huge basil crop-- I went down and picked as much as I could and have some nice homemade basil in my fridge and freezer :)

We're still navigating, but hoep this helps other people who dont know where to begin or think it will cost an arm and a leg. It won't- trust me!

We Also Don't Own A Scale

I have previously explained why we got rid of our microwave, now I would like to explain why we got rid of our scale.

I firmly believe if you are pursuing a healthy lfe style or excercise routine to loose weight then you are missing the point and will not have any joy or nearly the same amount when you push that idea out of your mind. For good.

"For while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come." 1 Tim. 4:8. Excercise is good-- but pursuing that alone or living for that is not. Dob;t get me wrong, we love hiking and walking together-- but we do it because it brings us so much joy to be together and to be out in God's creation. Its fun and refreshing.
If I were to make excercise the most important thing in my life, then it would be an idol. If I were to loose sight of why I excercise and become focused on how I look in this aspect, then I have fallen into one of the world's traps.

"See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God; and such we are. For this reason the world does not know us, because it did not know Him." 1 John 3:1

We like eating what God has naturally prepared for us, but we are doing it to be good stewards of our body not because we want to be a certain size. That just doesn't matter to the Lord-- I do think it is an area of struggle for every woman going back to Eve-- she knew she was naked and felt ashamed. All of the sudden she no longer saw herself how God saw her. Even in Song of Solomon, the bride asks the ladies to forgive her or to overlook her dark skin which in that area was looked down on. Woman and self image is just such an easy area for Satan to get a foothold. When our thoughts are more consumed with our weight then our love for God, we have lost sight of our first love.

"Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:4.

I do think moderate and times of fellowship with excercise are both enjoyable and a very nice time to connect with others. Nice quiet walks alone with the Lord are also wonderful times to pray and refresh. Eating well is wonderful too especially when you are doing it to nourish both body and soul.

Living without the scale is freeing and refreshing-- God doesn't ever say we must be a certain size or weight. " But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:37-39.

Are you ready to see yourself how god sees you? To recognize we have flawed bodies and that He loves us anyway? To enjoy excercise and healthy living not for what weight or size they can take us, but as a way to glorify Him and draw closer to Him? I admit, it isn't always easy for me and I am constantly learning, but not having that scale around has been a HUGE blessing!

Still No Microwave

I recently posted how we had stopped using our microwave. It is still sitting in our basement and now awaits being posted on Craigslist. I absolutely love not having it. We have been making way more things from scratch from tortillas to pizza dough and then some. We are more deliberate in how we prepare our food the first time around since we know there is no quick heating process should we choose it.

We are still going with no artificial bleached sugars or dyes. Someone asked me why don't we just use nutra sweet recently and the answer is it's an artificial sweetner that tricks your body into thinking its not sweet, lowers your metabolism, and some other pretty bad stuff. We try and by as much raw sugar as possible so it looks brownish and is more crystal cut. We use it limiting... Honestly it's a small little bag, but other then making tea from scratch or adding some to dough, it rarely gets used. That's very good.

We have also been eating more better quality ins still like grass fed cows. This is so much better too because less hormones, more natural, and your body can work with that much more. It will look different than your typical ground beef... Less grayish pink and more of a bright red. That alone should tip you off about the other stuff. Again, it is costly, but we don't eat meat every day and it allows us to not gourde ourselves on meatballs or meatloaf. I think when you are buying better ingredients and eating more real whole foods the way the lord intended you are less likely to pig out or want more snacks. They are incredibly satisfying.

Now, this next part is going to be more difficult, but we are looking to stop eating out. So many restraunts use microwaves and overly processed foods, and really instead of spending extra money here, it's so much nicer to eat at home and know exactly what goes into our food. We are generally using better ingredients, non bleached pastas and grains, and more vegetables. We have found Bahamas breeze to still be okay.... They serve hummus with vegetables and a freshly made vine ripened salsa. Their menu changes with what's in season. Is it perfect, no.... But is one of the better choices we have found.

Another change we have begun to make us soaking our beans. You can get so many servings from one bag of beans and they taste so much better. You have to plan ahead, but sometimes the convenience of cooking something doesn't always make it a healthy choice. But, right there is an example on a way that eating better can actually cost you less.

This week our goal is to visit a local dairy farm that sells its cow's milk right there along with some cheese. The cows eat grass and that's it. Really, isn't that the way God designed it. I think a good rule of thumb when buying something is to stop and think, is this in any way altered beyond the natural way God designed it? God make everything so tastey and nutritious. Yes it takes more time and maybe more effort, but it is a good responsibility to assume.

Healthier Pasta Sauce

I think I was 17 before I realized everyone didn't go home from church on Sunday morning and have a huge pasta dinner right afterwards. My dad is 100% Italian and having pasta less then twice a week was nothing short of criminal! My mom made red sauce, pasta or raviolis, and always had some extra sauce on the side.

I must admit, I love sauce so much, I don't put the extra bowl out, I just add it all in.... Extra shouldn't be an option because when it comes to pasta, it's a necessity.

So, how can you make your tomatoe sauce even better for you? Tomatoes are great, olive oil is okay, garlic and basil all good. But let's go further. I would immediately suggest adding a big handful of fresh spinach finely chopped so it might even look like a huge amount of basil. Now you have some leafy greens. Now, let's make your sauce blush.... Add a few spoonfuls of Greek or any organic yogurt that's plain. Not too much, just enough your sauce looses a little redness. Good, now we have added a whole extra veggie and some extra dairy. Now, why not grate some veggies ini there? It's easy, fast, and adds just a nice touch without overwhelming your palette. I normally grate some carrot and zest some green pepper. Why not? You want to go even further... Let's add a few crumbles of goat cheese.... So good for your digestive system!

Now, because I am a vegetarian, here's what I suggest on the side to mix in on top of your pasta and sauce...some nicely breaded eggplant and or zucchini baked in the oven. I bread my with pinko bread crumbs and lightly bake them and they taste so, so, so good on your pasta.


I love pasta. I could live on pasta,but I want to make sure it's giving my body tons of nourishment and these simple easy tricks will boost your sauces nutritional value too!

Free Giveaway over on Raising Olives

I absolutely love the raising Olives blog-- she has a pretty cool giveaway going on right now!

http://raisingolives.com/2012/08/matthew-family-bible-study-guide-giveaway/#comment-119391

You can check out Generations with Vision and their website as well as other studies here : http://generationswithvision.com/products/

We have yet to use their study, but have been looking into the proverbs one for our family.